My mother in law admits she hates me, and says she is going to keep hating me and pretending I do NOT exist until I in her words, change my ways. So let's see, I kiss her ass, go out of my way to be friendly with her, was there for her everytime she was upset and needed someone to talk to yet she wants the opposite.so I guess that means tell her to go screw herself and bitch slap her until my hand hurts then slap her for that?? I guess so if she wants the opposite.

You know I can admit I am not perfect. My mother in law insists Dec21 and I act like I am perfect. Yeah sure. I have never once claimed to be perfect or close to it. I have flaws just like everyone else. My weight isn't perfect, I wish I was taller, sometimes I can be overly sensitive, I don't like traveling in bad weather, I have an anxiety disorder, I do have a bit of a temper but it usually takes a lot to set it off, sometimes I can be a bit TOO sarcastic and I do love being close to my husband as much as possible and as often as possible. Oh yeah I'm also a bit on the lazy side. My father once said I was sorry. My response was "No I'm lazy..being lazy is a personal choice." I have other faults like..I talk too much sometimes when I'm nervous. I think too much and can get very indecisive. I do get nervous and paranoid about certain things but I got it pretty well under control. I don't drive like a crazy person but I have been known to speed a couple times. I do sometimes hold a grudge, not always but sometimes.

Now I've listed most of my faults, I could probably list more but why depress myself?? Has my mother in law ever mentioned a fault of hers?? Not really..usually it's in sarcasm like "I'm SOOOO sorry I'm not perfect!!"

I've done so much to try to get my mother in law's approval or at least for her to give me a chance, something she has never done. I've apologized for things that I have allegedly done or said that upset her, I've tried to understand her side on things. I even comforted her when she was depressed and suicidal. Did she appreciate that?? NOOOOOO Did I even get a "thank you" at all for being there for her?? NOOOOO. Has she said one kind word to me?? Umm let's think..this could take awhile to remember everything she's said over the last 6-7 years. Oh wait no it won't..NOOOOOOOOOOO!!

Everyone else she makes excuses for. I don't talk much when I first meet her because I was shy, she writes it off as my being rude and not wanting to get to know her. Her little foreign exchange student talks even less when we meet her and she says "She just doesn't know you." My sister in law gets involved with a killer wannabe, a drug dealer and a guy older than either of my in laws and had lived with his mother his whole life..and my sister in law has 3 kids, ignores them all when she had them (she never had all 3 of them at once) then ditches them completely, used to party all night, sleep all day, use child support money she used to get to buy alcohol and turned on the family numerous times. She would even disappear for months at a time not telling anyone where she was and worrying everyone..yet she's basically a perfect angel in my mother in law's eyes. Also when she was home, she used to bring home the scums of the universe around and my mother in law would treat them like gold and be all nice and sweet to them. Now me..I've kissed her ass, (yes I know I said that before but it seriously bares repeating) been there for her whenever she needed someone, got her real estate books when she was looking for a house to buy, went along with Dec21 and her when she wanted to go house hunting, bought her Christmas presents, sent her cards online and God knows what else..and what am I?? I'm basically Hitler and the devil combined and reincarnated. So how do you like that..criminals and drug dealers rank higher on her list than me!!

She still bitches that Dec21 and I don't visit much. We used to visit every few months and she treated me like something her dog deposited in the yard. She bitches if we don't stay a long time yet whenever she would visit she would stay one night usually if that. Once she got here at about 9 something at night and left the next morning. Yet it's a crime against humanity if we don't stay a long time when we visit?? We went up there for Thanksgiving one year and she said "No more over night visits, they aren't worth it." Oh really?? So then why does she only do them??

This next part I cannot believe. Apparently she flew in to check on her mother a week or two ago. Well, she went to visit our neice in another state, my sister in law in yet another state, and then her mother in another state..intentionally avoiding us. Then she has the nerve to call Dec21 and expect him to drive 3 hours to where she was and 3 hours back when she went to the other people's houses personally?? What the hell?? And you know..if she wants to hate me she can keep going and if she wants to avoid seeing me that's her choice..but why punish Dec21?? What did he do??

I keep telling Dec21 that I fully expect her one of these days to tell him he has to choose between me and her. My mother thinks she's already done that. Dec21 thinks she probably will do it one of these days and he plans on saying to her "Well I guess we won't be talking anymore, good bye."

Dec21 pointed out to my mother in law the other night that no one else in the family has a problem with me. He even told her that Dec21's father and I get along great. Her response?? "Well he doesn't know her well enough yet." If you say so woman.

Oh and this is just the icing right here. She says I twist every word she says around and uses it against her. She also alleges that I log every conversation I have with her and show it to Dec21. She admits the logs are 100% accurate..so how do I twist things around if all the logs are by her own words are 100% accurate?? Not to mention the other things she says to me she says in front of Dec21 and whoever else is nearby. So let's see..logs that she says are accurate and things she says with her own mouth in front of witnesses I twist around. Damn I want to know how she figures that!!

Anyways..like I told Dec21...the best thing that could happen right now is for my mother in law to get alztimer's. Yeah it's mean but it would solve SOOOO many problems.