That is the question I have been trying to figure out for a long time. I've seen several people I know be treated horribly by people they are involved with or were involved with. I don't understand why it's tolerated.

Examples:

The friend of mine that I grew up with is the best example. Her first serious boyfriend was a conceited airhead who for her birthday gave her a framed picture of himself standing next to his car. The ego on this guy was incredible!! Not to mention he lied more times than he told the truth.

One time when they were over here he was gloating that he had her at his beck and call. He even snapped his fingers between his legs telling her to come here. The thing is, I think he was serious. Well she got up and was going to leave after this rude gesture. He went over to her, and next thing we knew they were pressed against OUR wall making out. The guy was rude and she paid for just about everything. Yet she kept putting up with it.

Then he broke up with her, then came back to her begging her to take him back. Which she did, which pissed me off, but hey what could I do?? A week after she took him back and of course slept with him he dumped her AGAIN.

The guy didn't leave a good impression with my parents either. One time my friend called saying that the guy's battery died and could she use my parents' jumper cables. My parents agreed and the guy just pocketed the cables. After a few weeks passed, my parents getting angry over it and repeatedly asking for it back, they eventually got an old set of jumper cables back that looked older than God. He insisted those were the ones. We soon found out that wasn't true and my parents did eventually get the real jumper cables back.

All this time my friend was completely hooked on him. She even had numerous one night stands with him after they broke up. Once when she was pregnant with another guy's baby. She's currently with a guy who mentally abused her, wouldn't let her check the mail herself, watched her over the computer, listened in when she had a phone call, wouldn't allow her to use her own car, he'd keep the keys and keep her car low on gas and numerous other things. During this time everyone she knew was begging her to leave him. What does she do?? She puts up with it for about a year and a half, leaves him, gets back with him several months later claiming he changed. They are now married and she claims she loves him. I have doubts, especially considering she says there is no chemistry or passion. If a marriage has no chemistry or passion what's left?? Ask my parents, of course it took them quite a number of years to get to that point.

Another example is this guy I've mentioned online. The one with the ex who thinks she's Cleopatra. She came up with this idea for them to spend the weekend together and go to a seminar together. Well, considering he's still in love with the girl, he jumped at the chance. She now has decided she wants to be with her new boyfriend this weekend instead and cancelled the plans with this guy. She even said "It's not definite yet though." Gee how nice lady!! Would you like him to beg you and bring your slippers to you while you decide??

The guy of course gets upset, who could blame him?? She then has the nerve to say "I don't need you as my enemy." First of all that sounds like a guilt trip, and second of all she should have thought of that.

In my opinion she's using this guy as a back up. If she doesn't have plans she'll call him so she doesn't have to be alone. Then if something else comes along she'll dump him. I'm surprised the stupid girl didn't ask if she could bring the new boyfriend with her to his house. He showed me an e-mail he sent her in response to what she is doing. I told him he should completely ignore her. She's using him and manipulating him for her own pleasure. You would think all this would make him see the light and ignore her forever. Instead he says "If she apologizes.." You can guess his intentions after that phrase. In my opinion it shouldn't matter if she apologizes. She keeps doing this over and over again and gets upset at him because he can't handle her flirting with another guy right in front of him. I mean, what the hell?? You know??

Why do people put up with this?? Is it lack of self esteem?? Being desperate?? Stupidity?? The sad part is these people and others know they are being treated badly and tolerate it. They think the person doing it to them really cares. Wake up!! People who really care will not do this to you over and over and over again!!

It angers me the way some people just let others continously walk all over them. It's not sad after awhile..it's pathetic. In a way you can't even feel sorry for them after awhile. They see for themselves how much it hurts, that the person isn't going to change yet they keep putting up with it. They let it happen. They won't take a stand and such "Go to hell!!" walk away and not think twice. In my opinion that's a big reason why so many people keep doing it. They get away with it without much if any complaint so they keep doing it to the person knowing they aren't going to stand up for themselves and demand respect. The friends who have to listen when the person complains can only give advice but it usually doesn't work and that's even more frustrating.

How many times have the friends who have to hear heard "it's going to stop now." or "that's the last straw." We believe the ones saying it at first then all is forgiven and the cycle continues.

If you feel sorry for these type people at all, don't feel sorry for the way they are being treated, feel sorry for the fact that they allow it to continue.